Thank you for the Music

"I’m nothing special, in fact I’m a bit of a bore

If I tell a joke, you’ve probably heard it before
But I have a talent, a wonderful thing
’cause everyone listens when I start to sing
I’m so grateful and proud
All I want is to sing it out loud

So I say
Thank you for the music, the songs I’m singing
Thanks for all the joy they’re bringing...."

The above quoted lines are part of the lyrics of a very famous song of ABBA "Thank you for the Music" . When i heard it recently I thought it is matching very much with the state of affairs regarding me and my association with Music. Then i thought why not I too thank Music

Where to stay?

This is the main question that comes in the mind of most of the people who come to Mumbai from outside. Out of the three basic necessities of a human being which are food , clothing and shelter, in Mumbai, Food and clothing are not major problematic areas. In other words, one can find a way to earn and buy himself food and clothing with not much difficulty. But shelter...a place to live...a place to sleep at night is a dream for many.

It was no different for me as well. I came to Mumbai in 1976 and before I moved into my own flat in 1984, I had to change 12 places within a span of 8 years.

At my cousins place in Chembur

In my case I was lucky to have started my life in Mumbai without much difficulty for accommodation. My cousin was indeed very generous to have taken me without expressing any displeasure anytime. That too when my bhabhi (his wife) had just delivered their second child(a boy, who is now married and a father himself). Their apartment, a small 1 bedroom-hall-kitchen type was very much insufficient to accommodate 4 adults (my cousin his wife, my cousin's mother and me) and two children.
After three months my cousin told me to look for another place to stay as it would not be possible for him to keep me for ever. In fact I feel ashamed that I had to be told that.. Honestly it did not strike me anytime that I should be moving out and staying somewhere else on my own
Then I started to look out and got a place in Chembur itself. It was with one of my friends from Thrissur who was staying with some of his friends and acquaintances


At I Road, Chembur, Mumbai.

The place was a portion of a flat. Our portion comprised of a 14' x 10' room and a 6' x 6'kitchen-cum-bath room and a passage of 4' x 3'. There was a backyard, a rarity these days, where there was a toilet. For taking bath we have to use the cleaning area in the kitchen. In the available place we have to do all our activities like cooking, eating, sleeping, washing and bathing. The space as per anyone's guess is quite sufficient only for about 2 or 3 persons. But we were 12 persons living in that place !!! It was hired to a person by name Ramalingam, who is a good friend of my friend Sundar. On Sundar's recommendation, I was also taken into the group. There were a few who worked in shifts, which facilitated for others to get enough space to sleep at night. So at any point of time there will not be more than 8 persons sleeping in the room. But the problem will be on a public holiday or some common holidays. Cooking will have to be done by all in turns. It was not a major issue for me as I always loved cooking. But cooking for so many people was indeed a problem. Yet I managed...

After about 3 months,Ramalingam, unfortunately(!?), decided to get married. Why couldn't he marry after a couple of years,we had thought amongst ourselves,though we knew it was so rude of us. He was around 35 then... Obviously he would need the house for himself after the marriage. We had to start looking for a new place. Four of us found a flat in Mulund, a suburb on the North Eastern side of Mumbai..



A Modern Day Bachelors' Den in Mumbai(Commentary in Malayalam)



At Jaipoorna society, Mulund West.

A self contained flat with small living room (10' x 10'), kitchen and a bathroom-cum-toilet. It was a great relief to get such a 'large' flat for four of us. We were all so proud of it and considered ourselves very lucky to have got such a place. The four of us , Sundar(my friend) ,his brother Veeran, their friend Murugan and me started to live there around February 1977. The arrangements were quite like in Chembur. Cooking was to be done by all in turns. Till about December 1977 it was really fun staying with all of them and everything went on smoothly. In December I joined Mr. Patel's firm where the working hours were quite long. Then it was becoming a problem for me to do household activities..mainly cooking when my turn comes. I used to come very late from work and hardly got any time to do cooking . I had, those days, just two pairs of dress..two shirts and two pants. After coming from work I need to wash them daily or else I wont have any clean dress to wear the next day. And I could not afford to buy more dresses at that time. Working in office for 16- hrs a day and travelling for about two hours to and fro and then washing etc., left very little time for me to do anything else...I hardly even slept those days . Most of the days I reached home at about 11.00pm. Then I wash the clothes, eat something and go to sleep at 1.00 am. Wake up at 5.00 am to leave for work at 6.00 am. Life was so hectic and strenuous that it was affecting my health as well. But could not find any solution. I faced whatever happened. My non-cooperative attitude(as the inmates of the house felt it) was creating some tension at home. Initially they all used to tell me jovially, hinting that I am just coming to eat whatever they cook.. Though I understood what they were trying to communicate. I remained non reactive as I had no solution to suggest, nor could do as they want.

Ultimately one day, Sundar told me that as they all felt that I am not being helpful to them in the household works like cooking and cleaning etc., I can no more stay with them there and should look for another place to stay and shift within the next few days. . He also added that they are aware of my work timings, but could not take that as an excuse and cant help as they all, including him, found it quite difficult to cook and feed me as I hardly do cooking(I managed to do just once or twice in a fortnight in addition to all the off days I get). I had nothing to say. I knew that I was helpless. I told Sundar to give me at least one month time to locate a place.

At Jai Avadhpuri Society, Goregaon West.....

I got this place in the western suburbs of Mumbai. I will come back with the details of my life in western suburbs of Mumbai later..

First Major Appreciation For My Singing

My relationship with music as I said in my profile itself was from my early childhood. I was such a boy who used to capture the tune of any song within seconds of hearing that. My parents and all our acquaintances used to get really surprised to see this quality in me.

We were living quite close to where my grandparents,mother's parents, were living. Very often we go there. My grandpa, a musician himself was a very talented person having very good knowledge in carnatic music. In addition to being a good singer he also used to write songs in Tamil. He was a very respected person in the music circle. Many famous musicians from Madras(Chennai now) like M.D.Ramanathan(vocalist and music academician),GNB(vocalist),T.N.Krishnan(violinist) whenever they come to Calicut for recording in AIR used to come to his place and used to have discussions on music for hours,. I have seen many times they all having very heated arguments also...mostly on music related matters.

My grandpa used to make us, children - we four brothers and my cousins from Trichur whenever they come, listen to him singing for hours. I was not at all interested to listen to carnatic music in those days. My eldest brother Mani liked carnatic music , or at least pretended to be liking in front of grandpa and was his favourite amongst all of us. However as I was very scared of my grandpa as he was a very short tempered person and may punish if we, children, don't listen to what he says. But I would admit that he was too good in singing with great voice too. Always used to have the "vettila paakku" in his mouth. with full of the fluid of "vettila" in mouth he will keep humming with nose. I still remind my mother by imitating the way he used to do the 'khun khun khun' (humming with his mouth shut). But I was upset for his hatred for film music, a genre I am very fond of. I always thought that he was not being fair as when he forces us to like 'his' carnatic music why cant he appreciate 'our' film music?

One day when I was singing a hindi song.I was about 5-6 old years that time. I was in fact singing as if to myself while playing with something. I did not know that my grandpa was listening to me standing just behind me. I kept on singing the song and after sometime got up from there and was going to the attic room. Then my mom called me and asked

"Were you singing any song, sitting there"

I said "yes"

"Which one? " she asked.

I told her. " Why? Why are you asking all these questions?" I asked her.

"I dont know periappa (that's what we call grandpa) is calling you ...go and find out what he wants...".

I almost wet my trousers. At the same time I was getting rebellious too...So what if I sang a song ?, I thought. Doesn't he sing too? If this is the case I would never come here anymore.. I decided to tell mom my decision on whether I should come here any more or not after listening to whatever periappa had to say.

With great worry and fear I went to his room - a small dark room with an easy chair occupying most of the space it had, on which periappa always sat relaxingly. In a corner there is a big shelf with lots of books stacked on it - much more than it can actually have. On a centre-table near the easy chair was kept a Violin (Fiddle as periappa preferred to call it).

I entered the room almost shivering. Asked him if he wanted something. I was expecting at least a few outbursts from him. But to my surprise he was smiling at me. A really rare gesture from my periappa. I could not believe what I saw. I rubbed my eyes and started to look at him with more concentration ...yes he was indeed smiling. I too smiled at him with extreme happiness. I stood waiting for his further actions...

"Nanna padriye...."(you are indeed singing very well)

"mm" I could not say anything else..

"I liked it very much. You have sung with very good expressions. Sing that song fully here in front of me tomorrow"

I was soooo happy that I did not wait to hear anything more ...just ran away from there to tell mom what he said...I was damn sure mom would not believe what I say. She would think that I was cooking up a story.

That was my first major appreciation received for my song.

Well...enough for today..

Relief after the sad phase...

Crying and sitting in isolation for so many hours helped a lot. It really made me feel much better. I started to look at the whole thing in a different , positive angle. I took whatever has happened as a challenge and decided to prove that I am indeed a wise man to my parents and friends. I wanted to continue to be a role model to my friends...

All these are good thoughts but how do I achieve my goals. I decided to go to one of my close friends, Ravi, who lived in Ulhasnagar, a far away place. Those days telephone was not so common. There was no way to know if he is there at that time. I just have to go at any cost. I took the next crowded train to U'Nagar. Reached there around 9.00 pm. Luckily Ravi was home. Obviously his parents were not so happy to have a visitor, at that time . I apologized and asked Ravi to come out for a moment. He was kind enough to listen to my whole story with great concern. He told me to meet him at his office the next day morning around 11.30 by which time he would talk to his boss, Mr. Phiroze Patel about me. Though he didn't promise anything, but said would try his best to convince Mr. Patel and take me there in his firm.

Some consolation and some hope after a disastrous and painful day, I thought. Next day I was there in the industrial estate where Ravi's office was located at about 10.30 itself. But as he had told to come only at 11.30 waited till that time downstairs. When I entered his office Mr Patel was having discussions with Ravi. Seeing me they called me in. Patel had a very lengthy talk with me. I do not know what impressed him, he said come for work from tomorrow. I will be given a stipend of Rs. 500 for one month which will be a sort of observation period and after which if found ok, will be put on regular rolls.

I was sooooo thankful to my stars, Ravi and Mr. Patel. I joined them next day and was there with them for another year. Patel liked me and my work very well that after the observation period he increased my salary to Rs. 700 which was considered a very good those days. But the problem there was the work load. I had to work 16-18 hours a day....that too real hard work. In addition to the production activities, Moreover I was also given charge of the laboratory , thanks my over smartness. With an intention to impress Patel I used to show off my knowledge in Chemistry very much to him, which though did impress him, but gave me extra work load - laboratory came under my charge.:-( . It was affecting my health and I wanted get away from a production job altogether. I was eagerly looking out for a 10 to 5 job.


At last I got a job in a major Home appliances company. I joined them in September 1978. I was taken as a production clerk in their Production accounts dept. Production accounts was a unique department. It was neither a production dept nor an accounts dept. But I got what I wanted . The work timings were fixed. I was expected to account for the production output of each workman. Being attached to factory have to work in shifts. I had no issues to that. At least I could leave at a fixed time. That was a big perquisite.

I enjoyed the work quite well...Good working atmosphere and good salary in well established company. You all wont believe, I celebrated my completing ONE year in that company by throwing a party to my friends as it was the first job where I worked a full year for the first time. And subsequently, I ended up working in this firm for 19 long years with lots changes in my positions - always growing unbelievably to greater heights..

Rest in my next...

This is Mumbai.....

I will straight away jump many years and come to a time when I was struggling for a job in Mumbai. I came to Mumbai in 1976.



Stayed with my cousin brother, in Chembur. I am so indebted to him who, without any objection took me with him in his One bedroom apartment. Recently I was imagining if some cousin of mine comes to Mumbai,like I had come years ago and wishes to stay with me like I did with my cousin in 1976, would I have keep him? Probably not. Despite having a much spacious flat than the one my cousin in Chembur had, I would not. May be I am a mean person in my cousin brother's comparison...Anyway, I am very thankful to him for his generosity and big heart.

I came to Mumbai on the 12th September 1976. Started to go for work as a Trainee in Ambernath a distant suburb in Thane District. This job was managed with the help of my cousin. Worked there for about 6 months and shifted to another job in a lock manufacturing company in Sewree.

I was constantly on the look out for a better job. The job in lock company was not to my satisfaction, both monetarily and content wise.

After working there for about 6months I got an offer for job in a firm in Goregaon. I decided to take it up as it was in a chemical factory, me being a Chemistry graduate thought it would help me grow in my career.I resigned from the lock making firm. It was long since I had wanted to go to Kerala to my native place. But if I join the new job I cant get leave for at least a year. So I decided to go to Kerala before joining. Accordingly I asked Mr. Kamdar, the owner of that company to grant me permission to join for work after about a month by which time I can pay a visit to my parents in Kerala. He agreed. He told me to join duty on the 10th December positively.

I was sooo thrilled. I had almost a month to spend with my family and friends ..... I reached Calicut on the 15th November. This was my first visit to my home town as an employed and earning person. Though my income was so little I still bought everyone something or other. I was very proud to buy gifts with my own hard earned money. I bought my dad a shirt piece, a saree for my mother and a shirt piece for my second brother who was there with my parents. Bought something for my close friends in Feroke, who were all unemployed that time. I was a hero amongst them in those days.

All my friends wanted to be with me all the time. Though it was turning out to be a very costly affair for me , entertaining them , buying them smokes, tea, snacks whenever we all go out, buying movie tickets etc.,I some how managed. I told them the stories of my struggle in Mumbai to get a job, my day to day activities etc., They heard them all in silence. I could see a bit of jealousy in their eyes as I told them about joining a better job on my return to Mumbai after the vacation.

I started to get many requests from the parents of many of my friends to take their son also to Mumbai. I told them with great confidence that I can get them jobs without any problem if only they could manage to arrange for their stay. And that was the bottleneck really - then and now also. My parents were also very proud to see their son well settled or at least moving in the right direction in his life.

At last the day came for me to return.. All were sad ...so was I. But what to do...have to go... all my friends came to the railway station for seeing me off. I was a bit cheerful than other times as I was quite thrilled to join the new job. I reached Mumbai on the 8th December. Two more days...I will be joining the new job on the 10th.

On the 10th I reached the new office.. at 10 AM. Went to the reception and there I saw a senior official who also had interviewed me. I wished him Good morning and told him that I have come. Then he looked stunned and asked me what for...

For a moment I could not say anything. Then after few seconds I said I have come to join duty...I was sure he would recollect me. Again he asked me what duty..

That was it..I started to perspire in that winter morning..I narrated everything to him and told him I have come to join after my return from Kerala. He recollected but said without any guilty feeling that they have already appointed someone else for the post for which I was recruited. They did so, he said, as they needed someone urgently and could not wait for my return. I said you had my address and you could have sent me a telegram...I pleaded with all my logical points. I demanded to see Mr. Kamdar who was the owner. He, Mr. Kamdar, also came after a few minutes. He just said SORRY.

I was shattered..I had nothing else to do now. I knew no amount of fighting is going to make any difference. What is the point even if they take me in, if they want they can put me in to greater troubles. Basically they were people with no principles or ethics. Good that I did not join them...But what do I do. All those big big dreams of mine and the ambitions I had about my career turned out to be meaning less. My livelihood and existence are at stake on one side. On the other side what do I tell my parents who are waiting to read my experiences in the new company through my letters, my friends to whom I am a role model - I was a person, according to my friends who is very wise and takes only right decisions.

I just came out of that place and went straight to Dadar to Shivaji Park, a public park. Sat on a bench in a corner, away from anyone's sight and started to cry...cried my heart out, like a baby. I could not control my emotions . I had no one in Mumbai who can console me nor advice me. And I did not like going to any relatives. After all the decision to change job was mine. From 11.30 in the morning till 6.00pm I was in the park. Sitting and thinking what to do next. I did not get any idea.

Ok...let me stop it now..rest of the story will be told later.

Stories or Memories - Starter

It has been long I wanted to write about my childhood, youth and the struggle I had to undergo to make myself stand on my own foot in Mumbai. Not that they are of any educative value...may be they would prove to be more of a negative model for the present generation. I was not so disciplined nor am I now also. But I try to be one.

I will not be going in a chronological order. I wont be able to do that. I will keep writing whatever comes to my mind in the sequence it strikes me. May be after some days of this I will get some idea as to how to go about it..

To start with let me narrate my KG class days...I was brought up in a place called Feroke, near Calicut, Kerala. I am saying 'brought up' because I was born in another place close to Feroke, called Kallayi - a place very famous for timber business. Kallayi was considered to be biggest timber market in the world after Ottawa in Canada. I am not too sure if that is so even now. .

I am the last of we four brothers. I have no sisters - something I always used to feel bad about. I always used to and still envy those having sisters. My father was a college professor, teaching Physics. Mother though was only educated up to 8th std, always considered herself quite well educated may be due to her association with a college teacher - my dad. My eldest brother, Mani is 10 years elder to me. The next brother Ramanan is 3 years younger to Mani. The third one Moorthy is 5 years elder to me or 5 years younger to Mani.

I was a sick boy - used to fall sick with asthma very often right my early age itself. Was very thin too. As a result my parents were over protective about me. They did not want to put me in a school which is very far or where there is no one to look after me. All my brothers were in Kallayi during their primary classes. By the time we shifted to Feroke my brothers had finished their primary classes. So my dad was not too sure which are the good schools nearby. He decided to put me in a Muslim school - a school where only Muslim boys were admitted, mainly due to the fact that the Head master of that school was known to him. My admission there was done as a special case Headmaster agreed to take me daily with him in the morning and will leave me home while returning in the evening. I was there in that school just for a year.

I was admitted to nursery class. I still remember all the boys in the class had clean shaven head, as was the practice amongst Muslims... and all the girls had a thin veil sort of clothe on their head covering the hair...this cloth is called 'Thattam'. They , the Muslim kids were quite amused to have a Hindu boy amongst them. Though I don't remember what all I used to talk with them, I remember that they used to look at me as if looking at an animal in a zoo...with curious eyes and expressions.

Enough for today...Shall write more tomorrow.